what's done cannot be undone.

Officially done trying, I mean, for studies. I did study so much more than before, but what did I get in return? A couple of B4s, C5s and an E8. Well, so much for studying. Can I just not give a damn anymore? It's so demoralising to get substandard results and see people complaining about their good results. Like hey, have you ever spared a thought for me? If you could score so well, I jolly well assume that you have brains to spare a thoughts for others. Aren't I right? Confront me if you don't agree okay. I've been such a burden I swear to everyone at every moment."We are who we believe we are." I don't even believe in anything anymore. So choked with everything right now, can't you even give a break? Talk also cannot then what you want. Maybe when I'm gone everything's going to end. I'm so clear about what I want now, get into any JCs and yeah some other stuff as well. 

Oh wells, 22 more days to the start of Os. May the odds be in my favour. 

I'm not suicidal but this is kinda true.

Ask away: ask.fm/gohzhiyin
:)

holes inside.

That everything will be okay,
I know that it's so easy to say,
But the pain inside will fade,
Please tell me that you'll stay.

Study with the usuals and Jia Min today :) It was rather productive for me, only completed a few chapters of Bio Textbook but it's alright. Met Kirsten for a short while afterwards :3 Today's the 12, #throwback to seven months ago, hmmm if I didn't agree maybe things will be different now. Or maybe not. I've to get out of all these thoughts for now, it's really not worth my time at all.

Thanks...for the pageviews? To whoever this may concern ;)

everything that drowns me makes me want to fly

Looking at the pageviews today just scares me a little. I wonder who read my blog but oh wells, thanks for reading anyways :') Just Be Yourself. There is no rule that binds me to always please others, I've lived out of it, time to be myself. You don't like how I am but just leave me, the door is always open for you to go. Period. Yesterday I was an emotional rollercoaster, what a fasinating ride.  Boohoo. Enough of emotional breakdowns, crying myself to sleep, I'm tired of all those. Idgaf anymore okay. 

Cheered myself up buying a cap with Chelsea haha, what a day trying to make ourselves and taking lots of retarded pictures. Don't judge. I don't care anyways if you do, so smile ;)

naughty face HAHAH. meh,

I did't choose you, my heart did. I'm sorry.

You took me for granted so don't blame me when I leave.

Hey you, I guess this really sucks, loving you yet knowing everything's not going to turn out right. Not anymore. Because I've lost mt first chance, never getting a second. Never again. Seeing you making someone else's day, it breaks me a little. Hear that? That's the sound of my fragile heart breaking into pieces. I pick up the bits and pieces, trying to piece them back again. Everything's the same again, just that now my heart is full of scars and scabs. It's ugly, can it stop beating one day so everything's that is painful will end? How great that will be. I realised so much after we let go. I realised I didn't truly love you. But things have changed, I think I love you better now. I love you the way you are, no matter what happens I want to love you for now, I want to stay. How long will this actually last again? That's a questions I've yet to find an answer to it. You're either the one for me if not just a painful sweet memory. Don't care or bother about me anymore, you know I ca't have that so don't give my any attention. I'll crave for more. For sure your girl is hurting because you're not showering her with your 100%, your girl wants everything not 99%. Maybe I;m someone so easy to use, for your benefit. One day, you'll leave like the rest, I'm afraid because by that time I would beg you to stay. I miss all those bitter sweet memories bu you don't remember anymore. I wished I could be her now, but it's fate I can't be her, so I'll resign to fate. I miss you, but I'm trying not to care. I love you, but I'm trying not to show. I want you, but what can I do when you're not even mine?